It’s a new month

Eakkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!!!! Huns! It’s the first of a new month, you know what that means.

You beat yourself the fuck up if you didn’t reach your goal last month. You talk down to yourself. You feel like a total failure. Oh look at all those other huns who reached their goal. They get a special shoutout from their upline.

But you…you didn’t earn the sequin pillow, or the purple gym bag (that you’ll never use), or the duet lipstick. You tried so hard, but did you really?

I mean come on, be honest with yourself, babe:

  • You didn’t want it bad enough.
  • But you thought you did everything.
  • You messaged every friend, every day.
  • You made Facebook posts all day long, and not just about Y so you make yourself look genuine and real.
  • You went live on Facebook every single day
  • You bought a LOT of inventory, your up-line said, “you’ll totally sell it all”!
  • You hired a sales coach
  • You listened to everything your sponsor said.

But today is April 1st, you can start from scratch!

Wait, I have to start completely over?

Yes hunbot, that’s how it works. And, lil boi please don’t be a negative negferret, you got this!

Listen to your sponsor, do exactly as she says! **You are feeling very sleepy.**


OH, look! It’s a Pie Scheme!

With the new month comes new goals.

Whats your goal this month? Achieve pink status? Wow hun, you really need to aim higher but ok.

BIG THINGS are totally going to happen for you this month babe! You’re going to rock this month!! You got this! Hun you really need to build yourself a team. You should sponsor at least 3 huns per week. You can do it!

Can I say KUDOS KUDOS KUDOS! Eakkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!! These are SUCH a good deal. On average you, I mean customers save on average 2% when they buy the kudos! You better buy the kudos too its only $89, its such a good deal. And how else will you “share” the kudos with the world if you don’t own it, hun?


But don’t worry if you don’t achieve your goals this month, you’ll have next month, and the month after that. But, Derek will be really disappointed in your hustle if you don’t achieve your goals. And, well hes soooooooooooo empowering.

Remember babe:



And last but definitely not least, post pics of the haven retreat for sexual abuse survivors, you’ll totally get sales!


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s